Back when I worked at a renowned coffee shop in the US, I wound up with a lot of really interesting stories to share, but the one that comes to mind is when some guy came through our drive-thru and ordered a mocha.
Now, this wasn’t any old mocha- no, he needed some extra sugar (I don’t judge), so he said to me over my headset "Can I get, like, a shit-ton of chocolate in that?" He started laughing, no doubt at the fact he used foul language during the customer/employee interaction… A social taboo, I do believe.
Without missing a beat, I respond in perfect deadpan voice; "Sir, I’m going to murder that motherfucker with chocolate."
My entire shift turns to me and looks like I’d just read a page off of the Necronomicon, all while the guy at the ordering box is bursting with uproarious laughter.
My managers give me a verbal warning, but it was pretty clear that I’d made the guy’s day, so they didn’t take any "real" action against me.
Afterwords, however, whenever I worked the espresso bar, they would tell me "Hey, can you go murder some drinks while [person] is on lunch?"
tl;dr- I am the drink-murderer.
via "I'm Going to Murder that Motherfucker with Chocolate." : TalesFromRetail.
